TheExpatJournals.com

It’s been nearly 7 months since I took my apartment in Casco Viejo.To recap, for the better part of a year, I researched Panama and was absolutley smitten from afar. By the time I came down to spend a month exploring, I felt like I knew the place fairly well; it was just a matter of seeing and experiencing the information accumulated in my head, making it real as it were.
While a part of me loved the mountains in particular, I live alone. And I knew the isolation of my heart’s desire would become the internal enemy. Living alone in the country works to my detriment no matter how much I might desire it. So, that part of the decision was a given–Panama City was the only feasible place to look. I was counciled by virtually everyone I had come in contact with NOT to move to Casco Viejo, but rather choose El Cangrejo or Paitilla because those neighborhoods were safe and offered access to conveniences that Casco Viejo just didn’t offer. But my heart was in Casco Viejo, so on the last day I was visiting, I rented an apartment and worked out a lease purchase deal with the owner. Then I left to go back to NYC where I stayed for 8 days during which time I sublet my apartment for the summer and headed straight back to Panama.

The three years leading up to this point had been pretty rough: Sept. 11th, the death of my closest friend, working 130 hours a week, stress, stress, stress. As I walked through Tocumen to return to NYC, I realized I really didn’t want to even go back. That was a first! New York had always been my ’security blanket’. And now, a feeling of happiness inside brought tears to my eyes…the very presence of it made me acutely aware that it had been missing. It had been so long since I felt happy that I had forgotten what it felt like. Until now.

So, I arrived back in Panama on June the 10th to begin building a life here. In Casco Viejo. The process of discovery is in all my journals that are posted, so I won’t be redundant. It’s easy to come down here and feel the thrill of vacation and, for many, that can quickly wear off. It hasn’t for me. It is different now. For those first few months, it was the thrill of discovery, the infatuation stage if you will. And to follow that analogy, now, I think I’m in love. And so far, it nurtures every part of my being: mind, body and soul.

After spending 2.5 months back in NYC, in December, I gave up my apartment. I thought Panama would feel different as a result of not having the base in NY, like uh oh…now you’re stuck. But that hasn’t been the case for even a moment…nor have I missed NYC at all.

So far, I’ve been to Bocas, Boquete, El Valle, Playa Blanca, Punta Chame, Campana, Cerro Azul, San Blas, Gamboa, San Carlos, Capira, Rio Mar, Santa Clara, Coronado, and most areas that are on the outskirts of the city. If anything is going to ’steal’ me away from Casco Viejo…the way Casco Viejo stole me away from New York City…it will be somewhere very near the city that offers the peace and quiet lacking here without giving up the amenities of the city.

Last week while having tea at 38 Manzanas with Panamanian friends who’s roots are in this neighborhood (and most Panamanians I’ve met all had relatives who lived in Casco Viejo), one said he never came over here because of what trouble it seemed to get here, but once here, always loved being here. I told him that living here doesn’t feel like living in Panama City…it feels like living in Casco Viejo.

When I first arrived, the fact that Cableonda doesn’t reach out here and it took nearly five weeks to get dsl due to the upgrading necessary on the phone lines, left me saying, “Casco Viejo might as well be in the interior!” And in some ways, a mini-version of that is true. It is indeed separate from the city and a world unto it’s own. I don’t live in Panama City. I live in Casco Viejo.

Yes, you have to leave the neighborhood to do any kind of shopping. And no, you can’t walk in or out of the neighborhood, only by car due to San Felipe and Chorillo, but I’ve never felt threatened with the windows down and I do know some Panamanians who won’t even drive through Chorillo. And I am perhaps the only non-local I know who will walk down to the Mercado Publico, hang a left and head up through Salsipuedes to the Peatonal. Nor do I hesitate to walk straight up Avenida Central to the Peatonal. And from there, you can walk through Calidonia. It’s a longer route, but those are the two exits that so far have been safe. Though I haven’t tried it, I hear that you can actually walk from Amador to the Mercado del Mariscos when the tide is out. And there’s part of me that feels quite certain, it’s probably not dangerous to walk out to Avenida Balboa, but it’s not comfortable feeling so conspicuous either.

I’ve learned a few things that are impossible to learn from afar. And I’m not talking about which furniture makers are best or where to buy tamari sauce, clothes, housewares or how you need to shop in order to avoid polillas in any items of wood; not how to keep the hormigas at bay, not where the best meat is or which restaurants offer what. The things I’m talking about cannot be relayed, only experienced. It’s the underbelly of the culture here, the things you sense to be true once you’ve tapped into what’s beneath the surface. More and more, it truly feels like growing up in the South I grew up in. I’ve even told Panamanians they are not allowed to tell any Southerner jokes because down here, they actually ARE all related to each other.

I could tell you that in the short time I’ve been here, Casco Viejo has exploded. At least 30 buildings have either completed restoration or begun. Sometimes, it seems like there’s nothing left to tap in this neighborhood. I could tell you that noise is the one thing that tends to drive most from this area and serious due diligence is in order prior to moving here. That means visiting your desired location from 11PM-3AM on a Friday or Saturday night. That means seeing how loud the locals blare their huge speakers on a Saturday afternoon.

Because of the growth spurt, I seriously doubt there are any lease purchase situations available anymore. Even my owner has arbitrarily changed the terms of our agreement. My apartment sat empty for about a year and, as much of the culture is prone to do here, I was offered a deal on remarkably good terms. A few months later, I guess he’s decided they were too good and has renigged on the terms. The lease purchase option was originally for 3 years. He’s decided one year makes more sense for him. In spite of what we have in writing.

But give it a minute and owners might reconsider. While I personally believe this is the only safe real estate investment in the city proper, I also watch apartments sit empty month after month after month. I know of one that has been empty for at least two years. They can’t rent it because of the noise across the street. I was told they were willing to rent it for $300 by a woman at San Felipe. So I sent a friend who was interested in spite of the noise. I hear she negotiated them `down’ to $400. Greed is beginning to permeate this neighborhood much to it’s detriment I’m afraid. Another friend took me to look at a very large property I had seen listed on two web sites. On one, it was 2 million and on the other it was 2.1 million. He tells me it’s 3 million. I don’t know about other Gringos, but I do my homework and when I think I’m being played, I’m out the door. I’m informing people of the experience and I’m not walking through that door again. Maybe if enough buyers or potential buyers turned their back on the lack of honor that is rampant here, the tide would turn. Maybe not, but I’m up for trying.

Owners ask a lot of money for rentals due to how much it does cost to renovate and then, in spite of what the developer quotes an investor interested in buying, it’s hard and slow to rent an apartment here. It’s not uncommon for an apartment to sit empty for over a year before it’s rented. And it’s not uncommon for people to rent, only to move out within 3 months because of noise. This is not a neighborhood where I would assume I could purchase an apartment as rental property. It’s too risky unless the location is just right. And there aren’t many of those left now. I think the day for that type of investment here is pretty much over. And for resale, the price is probably the most expensive non-island per square foot/meter in Panama. Which means selling renovated apartments is also a risky venture unless the apartment is of the noise-free, great view, safe area variety. And again, gone.

Many Panamanians are upgrading with the abundance of new properties on the market. They’re trading in their crank-to-open windows with the tiny C/B/E apartments for something higher in the sky, more spacious or less, swimming pools, parking and all tax free unlike their old apartments. And with new buyers coming in, who wants to buy the older apartments you have to pay tax on when the new ones are so abundant and offer more of the amenities we’re accustomed to? So in spite of all the new construction, it seems like linear movement as opposed to a population explosion. And the old apartments aren’t selling…but they’re renting.

Now back to Casco Viejo, there are the throngs of tourists all the time now that’s it’s summer. I don’t really mind them, but those huge buses they come in on spew diesel and engine noise into your living room as well as block traffic thus horns start blaring, etc. Why the office of Casco Antiquo doesn’t tap into the potential profit there is beyond me! First of all, from what I understand, those buses aren’t even allowed on these tiny narrow streets. The roads are only about 12 years old and look much, much older and I’m sure the buses aren’t helping. They pay no parking fees yet disrupt and damage the area. Someone needs to either issue a permit to drive through this neighborhood in a bus that size or better yet, direct them to a specified area to park and charge an outrageous fee designed to discourage the practice of these highway sized buses and force tour operators to use the smaller buses better suited to Casco Viejo. Someone is missing the bus, so to speak, on both the welfare of this neighborhood as well as potential income for the neighborhood. Perhaps anyone who lives here needs to have a special parking permit on their car…like in Boston…and anyone else is issued a ticket for parking illegally? Twice lately I’ve had at least a 10 minute wait just to be able to continue on the street. SUV’s park half on the sidewalk… rendering it virtually impossible to walk…and half on the street…rendering it virtually impossible for anything but the smallest of cars to get through. So larger cars end up driving on the other sidewalk in order to get through. How ridiculous is that? How damaging is that? And how dangerous for the kids and pets that are here and how inconvenient for those of us who do live here? By actually policing things that would make the neighborhood safer and more liveable, how much revenue could be raised in fines alone?

But then again, no one is asking me what I think and my Spanish wouldn’t up to that particular discussion yet anyway. So I seethe upon occasion and have no choice but to close the doors no matter how perfect the temperature might be outside and run my very expensive air conditioning to compensate. It does start to get old no matter how much I love this neighborhood.

Speaking of electricity, one of the things that happens here is that the locals, aka the have-nots, tap into the electricity lines of the ‘haves’ so you need to be prepared to have your bill investigated if it seems too high. And boy is electricity expensive here. If you need to live in an air-conditioned apartment at all times, it’s going to cost almost what your rent or mortgage does to cool. If you want Vonage, in Casco Viejo there is no Cableonda, and only an ethernet box, NOT a USB plug-n-play box, from Cable & Wireless will suffice. Wireless internet is available here and is outrageously expensive. What I paid $40 a month for in NYC in terms of broadband costs me $80 here and is only that low because of a package deal with the phone
line for a total of $120 a month. And I still can’t clock the speed I pay for. And fast wireless here of the same speed would cost $180 a month.

And now the government has unveiled it’s five year plan for Casco Viejo that includes:

• Cracking down on the absentee owners sitting on property. Which I think is a good thing in the long run, but will mean the displacement of more locals in the short term and I have to wonder how that will impact the safety in the transition period. Right now, locals are happy to live and I don’t sense resentment. Will that change as their homes are even more threatened than they are now? In my mind, it’s not poverty that incites criminal behavior, it’s desperation and hopelessness.
• New public parking spaces are in the design and are desperately needed. That I do applaud. Apparently there was also talk of some system of public transportation, perhaps even the old trolleys. That could be both great for the residents and quaint for the tourists, but I’m at a loss of how anyone who does have a car here could drive on the streets given the fact that’s where all the trolley tracks are.
• Underground utilities. Should enable residents to pay only their own electricity bill, so I applaud. It’s actually quite bizarre to walk around see all the utility wires scalloped from building to building on the front. Never has seemed very safe, but like other things, you just get used to it.
• A three day festival in May. I attended the recent jazz festival in La Plaza de Catedral and the feeling was priceless! I’m not much of a jazz fan, but watching a somewhat crippled old man standing alone in the Plaza bopping to the sounds of an American woman was enough to turn it into a raging success in my eyes. I could see how much this was appreciated by those who could never afford to pay to attend. And I loved that for them and appreciated Donilo Perez for the gift he
provided. The festive feel in the neighborhood was indescribable! It was like the biggest block party I’ve ever attended and the feeling of good will permeating throughout was palpable. Merchants sold out of everything! By 11PM, there was no food or drink to be had, so I know how great it was for local restaurants and shops. I had a previously scheduled dinner that night and had to walk nearly to the exit to get a taxi. Traffic was a parking lot. Now that’s when those public trolleys could have not only been very useful, but would have made a lot of money in fares! But why May? It rains in May. Musicians don’t like to risk electrocution. Vendors don’t like their wares or food to get soaking wet. I suppose that, between Christmas, Carnival and Easter…it’s already enough incentive and the summer (US summer) months are too wet.
• Connecting Amador to Casco Viejo. Now that’s interesting. That will serve many purposes and maybe, just maybe, in the long run, you could at least ride a bicycle from Casco Viejo to Amador. But Avenida de las Poetas is very scary territory. That’s an area most Panamanians I know wouldn’t dare even drive through and if they do, their windows are up and their doors are locked. It’s such a beautiful drive that it’s a shame it’s not safe. Will the renovation inch it’s way around the waterfront? I say inch rather than sweep, because from what I hear, it’s taken about 30 years to get Casco Viejo
to this level.
• The continued renovation by the government all makes sense. Opening shops for artisans and restaurants…all good.

I still don’t understand why they don’t seize the opportunity to make buses pay for the privilege of coming here and pay through the nose for parking. I still don’t understand why the SUV’s aren’t ticketed when they park on the sidewalk. And I’ll never understand why everyone in this neighborhood feels like it’s okay to use the bathroom out in the open beside the Union Club. In fact, I have no idea of what the police in this neighborhood actually do.

All in all, the problems I see in this neighborhood have nothing to do with it’s reputation for being dangerous. And let’s face it, the bottom line is always, “Is it worth the price of admission?” Every neighborhood in every city in the world will have it’s pros and cons. For me, I’d still rather live here than anywhere else in Panama City. I absolutely love it’s charm, it’s architecture, it’s location, it’s mingling of cultures and economies, it’s beautiful plazas, it’s silence on weeknights and even the energy of what in NYC would be called the Bridge and Tunnel crew all swarming down on us for their weekend party time. I like the feel of an active neighborhood as long as I’m not trying to go to sleep. It seems so busy, so festive and half the local guys get to earn their living as impromptu valet services. Everyone’s out, music is blaring, the ladies are all
cooking in their doorways for their neighbors to buy plates of fried chicken, potato salad and unidentified meats I don’t even want to know about. It’s beyond a pulse, it’s a throb!

I still love the fact that I can yell up at someone’s apartment and find out from the folks on the balcony across the street that she left for the airport an hour and a half ago. I love it when I get messages from the locals on the street that someone was looking for me. I love it when I hear from friends that they came by and someone told them how long I had been gone. Somehow, it doesn’t feel invasive and unlike some even more cynical than this ex-New Yorker, I do not worry that my absence is an invitation to burglary. It feels like we’re neighbors.

No, I don’t feel like I live in Panama City. I feel like I live in Casco Viejo. And I feel privileged to be in here before other
Americans are. And I hope the others that come understand that this place is special, that’s it’s a neighborhood culture where everyone knows everyone else and we all get along. Well, except for the neighbor’s dog which I think I plan to begin dosing with melatonin. It’s not in me to harm, but I’m not seeing the harm in him dozing the afternoon away.